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Writer's pictureBola Abimbola

Alone and not Lonely

Updated: Nov 29, 2022

How to embody being alone dropping being lonely.



Being alone, on your own, whether by choice or unexpected is different from being lonely. In fact you can be surrounded by many people everyday and still feel lonely. Loneliness comes about when we hold certain thoughts and feelings within us. These thoughts and feelings are usually negative, for example, feeling abandoned or self pity. We can learn to notice these feelings when they arise, when we feel our energy drop. We can learn to reframe them, transform and let them go. Yes we can.


For many years, I held on to relationships that were toxic for me, because I felt that I would rather be abused than be alone and lonely. Even when I was Lonely in a relationship, I felt it was better to be committed to it and give my all. I had to learn to step back and focus on myself. It was when I did this, that my reality changed. My relationships changed AFTER I changed and not before. When we feel lonely, it is a hint that we feel abandoned by our own self.


Loneliness is an indication of our mental health. That feeling is telling us that we are holding a mindset of loss or lack. This loss or lack may have to do with our status or our social circle or our own self. We are dwelling on what we do not have and do not see what we have. We can learn to let go of this mindset to embrace more empowering beliefs about who we really are.

It takes courage and a decision to release the unhelpful thoughts and feelings over time using transformational tools and modalities that work with us. Our goal is to go within, knowing our solution is not outside of us. Our goal is to reconnect with our own inner child, to love and accept our own self, to nurture and unleash the self worth that is naturally present within us buried beneath limiting beliefs and lack mindset.


I invite you to set an intention to let go of the feelings and thoughts making you feel lonely. Set this intention now.


✅Setting the intention is the first step.


✅Take the next steps of actually letting go by trying out different modalities of healing and transformation. Get the help you need to slow down and notice your thoughts that no longer serve you to let them go.


✅Remember the good abundance within you and in your life. Make gratitude lists of kind acts, loving works, thoughts that you have received. Make the lists in your mind, writing them down or saying them silently or out loud.


✅Focus on the good and let go of what is unhelpful. do this again and again and again .....


✅Show yourself self care, self respect. Do this again and again...


✅Pamper your self. again and again ...


✅Do to yourself the things you wished others would do or should have done. anytime, you feel that someone let you down by not doing something, make the choice to do something for yourself that makes you smile, laugh out loud. Take responsibility for your own smile and happiness. Step by step.

✅Remain open to your healing and transformation always, every waking moment. Make the choice to stay on your healing path. It took time to embed the limiting self, it will take some time to release it and unleash your true limitless self.


✅Believe in your higher self. There is a part of you that is connected to Higher Intelligence. You can learn to know more about this part of you, your Higher Self and allow it to guide your day to day with love.


Loneliness occurs when we have forgotten about ourselves, about who we really are.

Slow down, take time to remember and enjoy your own courageous amazing beautiful regal self.

NEXT STEPS


I am a Clarity and Emotional Freedom Coach. I empower you to cultivate emotional mastery. learn more about my Courses and programs here


Take the steps you need for your even more fulfilling life.


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