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Types of Relationship Abuse

Updated: Dec 28, 2022

Recognising Abuse and Self Awareness

How we react to abuse in our relationships (otherwise known as domestic violence) helps us transmute and transcend into Higher Frequency relationships.

58% of murders in 2017 were domestic violence victims according to this UN report.

Abuse is harm or cruelty to another and can be in many forms in relationships.

Sometimes we tolerate abuse without realising the impact on us

Sometimes we delay understanding our reactions such that we can care appropriately for our own well being

Often times we discern abuse but we do nothing because we feel we are safer staying in the abuse rather than walking or stepping back. The unknown seems more fearful. This is because of the beliefs we are holding.

Other times we are the ones abusing another. We may perpetuate abuse to another without realising or taking responsibility or accountability for what we are doing to another.

This article is to help highlight different behaviours so we can be willing to seek different more compassionate experiences.

Common forms of abuse are:

Financial abuse: when financial provision is denied, withheld, taken without consent or not returned as agreed. When one person promises their partner a financial provision and then withhold it without explanation that respects the other person, for instance not explaining why it is delayed or when it will be available, this is financial abuse. Not allowing access to funds, for instance via a bank account is financial abuse.

Emotional or Psychological abuse: when one partner ignores their partner’s mental health or emotions, or compels or encourages them to ignore their mental health or emotions, this is emotional abuse. For instance there is a contention and the attempt at resolution is not sought, for a prolonged time. Ignoring feelings of your partner beyond a few days as you process your own is emotional abuse. Behaviours such as name calling, lying, shouting, ignoring calls etc are forms of emotional abuse.

Sexual abuse: this is sexual exploitation. For instance, when sexual consent has not been given at all or not been given from a conscious empowered place by one person. Forcing sex on another is sexual abuse.

Physical abuse : when you hit your partner or cause harm/injury to the body of your partner this is physical abuse.

On average, every 1 in 4 females and every 1 in 7 males in the US experience physical assault by their partners.

Transmuting Abuse

Recognizing the abusive behaviour is the first thing.

Whether one is the perpetrator or on the receiving end, it is important to recognize when physical abuse is becoming a pattern.

Then reflecting on how we respond or stop perpetuating the abuse, in a way that maintains our own frequency is fundamental.

To trust our own self, not get stuck in our minds or bodies such that we are not afraid to get away, to move out, to move forward. We can only be all that we can be when we continue to transmute our fears.

Whatever type of abuse, the first thing is to discern that the abuse is not appropriate and to begin to understand how to take back your power. To believe that a different experience, a different outcome is possible for you.

Choosing to walk away from abuse opens up the other more compassionate options and opportunities on one’s path.

Making the choice, having a new intention, maintaining this again and again through releasing redundant beliefs, allows a higher vibration within us firstly, which then energises us, scales us away from perceiving ourselves as the victim, from being the perpetrator or from fear based mindset.

We can take empowered steps into our own compassionate true nature.

The options available to us may not become evident until we discern a need for change at all costs and take action.

The shifts we begin to make inside of us create a different perception around us. We come across things/resources/people we were not aware of before, who can help us push through the barriers.

Start from where you are.

Do not give up. Life can be more enjoyable, after recovery and healing from abuse.

Self awareness and Self compassion cultivation go a long way.


I am a Speaker, Coach, Teacher and Energy Practitioner.

If you are interested in experiencing a change in your outlook, outcomes or experiences and want to work with me as your coach, check out my SMITT Emotional Mastery program here

Access my free resources toolkit here

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